Well, I’m just wondering why is it that everyone in my household ALWAYS wants to be in exactly the same room that I am? Believe me I am thrilled that I can be what it feels to be the central HUB of this operation, but seriously I need some me time, sometimes. 

 

I live in a household full of testosterone. We have the boys, then the one who calls himself “The Man” (this my friends, is always a questionable statement) , two male dogs, and that leaves two of us only biotches: the cat and me. 

 

I try to hide. I’m not ashamed to admit it – I run away to the office (while we are still in the big house, as in a couple of weeks we are downgrading to a house half the size of this one and I won’t have an office anymore – THE HORROR!). First of all, the cat is always in the office. It is the coziest and craziest place in the whole house. Then come the dogs and they start playing. I guess the noise attracts the rest of the HE-MEN living in the house and next thing you know I have to leave to find refuge somewhere else. Then it all repeats, because apparently nobody living in this house can leave me the hell alone! 

 

The same happens in bed. We have a king size bed that for some reason I don’t understand, my husband absolutely, unquestionably needed that big of a bed. I’m the kind of person that sleeps in the same spot all night, almost always near the edge as I feel suffocated otherwise. When I wake in the morning, my side of the bed is hardly disturbed, and only needs a few tugs to set straight. My husband’s side, looks like a hurricane just hit it and he was buried somewhere beneath all the blankets. The point is, that even though I only need a very small space on the bed, my husband won’t stay on his side. He comes over and hounds me on my side of the bed to the point I can’t even change positions because if I move, I WILL FALL OFF. How can anyone who is not a large person use such a big bed in that way?  

 

I have tried to turn around and sleep head-on-the feet type of thing, and I have tried moving to the other side… but I’m always found out and asked to “come back” to my righteous spot… If I don’t a pleading argument ensues and my sleep goes away – leaving me feeling cheated while “The Man” snores away into oblivion… No’ fair **sigh** (can you see me pouting?) Then comes the little one. He has gotten in the very bad habit of waking up in the middle of the night and coming over to our bed. Talk about crowding the bed! This little being has a particular way to squeeze himself in the tiniest spot and then… He spreads all his bony joints into my side and stretches out like an accordion… dang, I tell you, I just want my own room! Not sure if he does the same to his dad or not, because “The Man” sleeps quite hard. And LOUD. 

 

I know what you are going to say – you are so lucky they all want to be around you.. I know, I know. In spite of what everyone thinks, I do count my Blessings daily. In a couple of weeks I’ll have nowhere to run and hide. Which will force me to deal with all the testosterone and somehow I have to learn to like it. Me, the HUB of this household will continue to connect everyone around me. And I will be grateful and joyful to have my zany family around me every time it happens.